IAMA: Restaurant owner who saved his business... by keeping black diners away :/ AMA (self.IAmA)
submitted 6 hours ago by reluctantracist
I'll get it out of the way and admit that what I am doing is racist, I myself am (reluctantly!) a racist, and I'm not about to argue that. I'm not proud of this, but I did what I had to to stay afloat for the sake of my family and my employees and I would do it again.
I own a family restaurant that competes with large chains like Applebee's, Chili's, and other similarly awful places. I started this restaurant over 20 years ago, my wife is our manager, both of my kids work here when they're not in college. Our whole life is tied up in this place, and while it's a ton of hard work, we love it.
I've always prided myself that we serve food that's much fresher and better prepared than the franchise guys, and for years a steady flow of regular customers seemed to prove me right. We're the kind of place that has a huge wall of pictures of our happy customers we've known forever. However, our business was hit really hard after the market crashed, to the point where the place looked like a ghost town. A lot of the people I've known for years lost their jobs and either moved away or simply couldn't afford to eat out anymore.
To cut to the chase, we were sinking fast, and before long it was clear we would lose the restaurant before the year was out. The whole family got together and we decided we would try our best to ride it out, and my kids insisted they take a semester off and work full time to spare us the two salaries. I'm very proud of my family for the way they came together. We really worked our butts off trying to keep the place going with the reduced staff.
Well the whole racist thing started after my wife was being verbally abused by a black family. I came over to see what the problem was, and a teenage boy in their group actually said "This dumb bitch brought me the wrong drink. We want a different waitress that ain't a dumb bitch." His whole family roared with laughter at this, parents included!
We had had a lot more black diners since the downturn, and this kind of thing was actually depressingly common. Normally I would just lie down and take this, give them a different server, and apologize to their current one in back. But this was the last straw for me. No way was I going to send my daughter out to get the same abuse from these awful people. I threw the whole bunch out, even though other than the five of them, the place was completely dead.
I talked with my wife about it afterward, and we both decided that if we were going to lose the restaurant anyway, from now on we would run it OUR WAY. I empowered all of my employees to throw anyone who spoke to them that way out, and told them I would stand behind them 100%.
My wife, who has been a bleeding-heart liberal her whole life, told me in private that the absolute worst part of her job was dealing with black diners. Almost all of them were far noisier than our other customers, complained more, left huge messes and microscopic tips, when they tipped at all. She told me if we could just get rid of them, the place would actually be a joy to work at.
I've been in the restaurant business a long time, so this wasn't news to me, but to hear it from my wife, and later confirmed by my daughter... it had a big impact. I've never accepted any racial slurs in our household, and certainly not in my restaurant. I always taught my kids to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, and tried to do the right thing in spite of the sometimes overwhelming evidence right in front of me. But right then and there, I and my wife started planning ways to keep black people from eating at our restaurant.
First, I raised my prices. It had been long in coming, prices had skyrocketed, and we'd been trying to keep things reasonable because people were hurting. But this had brought in a ton of blacks who had been priced out of the other restaurants nearby, and so I raised my prices even higher. It worked, they would scream bloody murder when they saw the new prices on the menu, and often storm out of the place, not knowing that this was pretty much our plan.
We took a lot of other steps, changing the music, we took fried chicken off the menu, added a dress code that forbade baggy pants and athletic gear. I put up a tiny sign by the register that said "15% gratuity added to all checks" but we only added this to groups of black diners, since almost universally everyone else understands that tipping is customary.
As business started to pick up, we would tell groups of blacks that there was a long wait for a table. Whenever they complained about other patrons getting seated first, I would calmly explain that the other group had a reservation, and without fail they would storm out screaming.
And it worked! We managed to hang in through the rough times. It's been almost two years since we started running the business this way, and we're doing great, even better than we were before! I noticed as soon as the blacks started to leave, our regulars started coming back. Complaints dropped to almost nothing, our staff were happier, and the online reviews have been very positive. My kids are back in school, and my wife seems ten years younger, she's proud of her work and comes in happy every day.
Of course, I did this by doing something I know to be ethically wrong. I did it by treating a whole group of people like pests and driving them away in a low and cowardly way. (though it's not as if I could have put a sign out). I can't help but feel like I've become part of the problem. At the same time, the rational part of me realizes that I did the right thing, but I don't like knowing that I'm a bigot.
AMA.
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Megatron_McLargeHuge 257 points 6 hours ago[-]
The local outdoor mall plays country music in the public areas as a way of controlling who hangs out there. I've heard of stores using classical music to get rid of crowds of teenagers.
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AndreiTarkovsky 100 points 5 hours ago[-]
In Ottawa they play that elevator-style "jazz" all along the busiest part of the busiest shopping street in the city. Apparently they're trying to drive away everyone except my grandparents.
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Misanthropologist 25 points 3 hours ago[-]
I wouldn't have expected for either elevator jazz or Ottawa to be popular among people who died under Stalin.
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mobysperm 101 points 4 hours ago[-]
This TOTALLY works. My best friend owns a 7-11. He was constantly dealing with uncouth minority youths at his store. Country music in, kids out. He was never a bigot as long as knew him until he ran his own store.
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pauliwalnuts 22 points 3 hours ago[-]
Wait, Moby got a perm? But...he's....Oh. I get it.
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vventurius 56 points 4 hours ago[-]
I think having high prices and playing classical music, combined, acts as a great race-neutral and age-neutral filter for improving the average caliber of the folks that come to a place. I've seen this technique work many times. It doesn't explicitly disallow any particular race or age group, but does in actual practice shape it in the aggregate.
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ggggbabybabybaby 39 points 4 hours ago[-]
They used to play classical music at our subway stations. It seemed to chill people out and keep the nasty crowd away but deep down I had the urge to go all Clockwork Orange on somebody's ass.
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MrSnoobs 17 points 4 hours ago[-]
This happens all the time over here in the UK. Bus terminals and Train stations often play classical music. End result? Rowdy teens stay away. It's quite a surprising phenomenon - I wouldn't have believed it worked if I hadn't seen it for myself. Strangely, I haven't seen many shops use this method although I am sure it happens.
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vomit_and_cheese 82 points 5 hours ago[-]
A family friend used to manage a gym; they specifically converted the basketball court into a rock climbing wall / gymnastics studio to drive away most of their black clientele because of all the fights that would break out and late/no payments etc...
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TheCloned 33 points 2 hours ago[-]
Haha, my local gym just did this. Now I know why.
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jrik23 229 points 6 hours ago[-]
I am curious what you would have done if a well dressed extremely respectful black couple had walked in, would you give them the benefit of a doubt or would you stand on your, do everything you can to uphold your "get rid of blacky" policy?
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jayssite 144 points 3 hours ago[-]
I'm interested to hear the answer to this. I'm black, and the only thing I can hope for is that he would at least be prepared for the possible decent black guy. I don't like chicken (much), I don't listen to rap/R&B/whatever, I don't wear culturally-black clothing styles, and I would only be disappointed by a 15% added gratuity because I usually tip 20%. I would hope that he would let someone like me sit down when they saw that I was just a normal guy.
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cs80 38 points 3 hours ago[-]
I hope so too. This IAmA makes me sad.
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matchu 44 points 5 hours ago[-]
I think the point of setting the long wait times and the like is to discourage those who seem like they'd be bad customers, despite its being sketchy. If the couple carried themselves like good customers, then that would probably take precedence.
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EllipsisNazi 42 points 4 hours ago[-]
He'd better hope something like this doesn't happen:
Another 1996 incident occurred when six African-American United States Secret Service agents visited a Denny’s restaurant in Annapolis, Maryland. They were forced to wait an hour for service while their white companions were seated immediately upon entering.
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shakyamuni 110 points 6 hours ago[-]
What part of the country are you in?
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reluctantracist [S] 121 points 6 hours ago[-]
The Northeast.
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BlackRaspberries 51 points 4 hours ago[-]
I'm going out on a limb and saying you're from Providence.
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UNHskuh 350 points 4 hours ago[-]
Only white raspberries are allowed in this thread. Sorry.
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BlackRaspberries 171 points 3 hours ago[-]
... ok ...
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Weaponx86 524 points 6 hours ago[-]
Maybe you shouldn't have opened a Popeye's
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reluctantracist [S] 397 points 6 hours ago[-]
When I go to hell for this, I'm sure that's waiting for me.
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myweedishairy 95 points 5 hours ago[-]
In Hell, Bojangles bought ChickFilA, which bought Church's, which bought Zaxby's, which bought Popeye's. You are the only cashier employed at this fine establishment, and you work 25 hours a day.
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unclejimbo88 124 points 5 hours ago[-]
Luckily, there's still a KFC across the street.
That you also work at.
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itjitj 50 points 3 hours ago[-]
Your customers are now black. I'm on a horse.
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NumberThree 39 points 5 hours ago[-]
An Italian friend of mine went to hell once. Nine circles and no Popeye's. You should be alright on that front.
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slapper 132 points 5 hours ago[-]
Good thing for you there is no hell.
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ghostchamber 67 points 5 hours ago[-]
Oh, I think we can come really fucking close.
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nilhilustfrederi 60 points 4 hours ago[-]
Was expecting Detroit.
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k2cougar 22 points 3 hours ago[-]
I would rather walk through Detroit late night with dollar bills taped all over me than have palin as president.
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Sarah_Connor 7 points 53 minutes ago[-]
Actually, you know that Reddit island that 'we' were trying to buy...
I say fuck the island. Reddit should buy Detroit.
I AM SERIOUS.
I really think that we could build a highly networked community in a major city at a very reduced cost. We can get Google to sponsor the fiber to the communities and re-commission tracts of land as farm land.
Detroit is the new digital commune.
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123GoTeamShake 10 points 5 hours ago[-]
EXCUSE ME SIR, IT'S A CHURCHES!
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AnnArchist 106 points 6 hours ago[-]
First, I raised my prices.
HAHA that was the first thing I did to avoid getting a shitty roommate from craigslist! It worked!
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subjectobject 29 points 3 hours ago[-]
Dude, that's a good call. People who respond to craiglist ads for super cheap housing are... eccentric.
I tell you what, I do not miss Boxcar Mike and his merry band of hobos and bedbugs he brought with him.
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happybadger 37 points 2 hours ago[-]
THAT'S BOXCAR MIKESIST!
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kbradl1 136 points 6 hours ago[-]
You aren't the only one who has done it. Its well known that NY Taxi cabs blatantly skip black fares.
Economically its makes sense. You go with the customers that make you the most money.
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ShayneOSU 117 points 4 hours ago[-]
I'm pretty decent friends with a cab driver who has been driving for 30 years. He tells me that, hands down, black people are his least favorite people to pick up. They cause problems and don't tip.
Oh, and the cab driver is black.
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vomit_and_cheese 164 points 5 hours ago[-]
Cab drivers in Chicago also avoid driving around blacks -- and about 95% of the cab drivers are immigrants from Africa.
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floodo1 125 points 5 hours ago[-]
blacks tip like shit. they are also loud, apt to have you do extra shit like wait for them to load groceries in the trunk because they had you pick them up at the grocery store.
so yeah, as a cab driver i can either try to be nice to the black people who get no service because they act different than everyone else, or I can try to pay the rent by taking another fare.
see how the different treatment isn't predicated on race, but rather on an actual difference which corresponds to race? if black taxi customers started, on the whole, acting similar to the milieu that is all the other customers, then they wouldn't get passed up.
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erkapathy 121 points 4 hours ago[-]
This is how all this gets started. An instance of a demographic becoming a problem causes an already low threshhold to provide this customer quality service then, when cabs start passing by or waiters refuse to serve, it causes the person from this demographic to feel less inclined to treat someone providing them a service with respect or even a tip. It's a downward cycle broken only when someone says "fuckitall" and goes out of their way to break the cycle. The point is whether a customer or a service provider, treat others well and try not to hold a grudge when it isn't reciprocated.
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ijustpooped 32 points 3 hours ago[-]
"fuckitall" and goes out of their way to break the cycle. "
So everyone should just work around this asshole behavior? FUCK THAT! Black or white, people need to learn the hard way that they can't continue with this behavior.
If it just happens to be all blacks that do this, it's not the fault of the business owner or company for not servicing them or kicking them out. They need to change their fucking behavior.
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fingerinbellybutton 28 points 3 hours ago[-]
FUCK THAT! Black or white, people need to learn the hard way that they can't continue with this behavior.
A black man is on the street. He waves to the cab, and the cab goes by. What has the black man learned? Nothing. Maybe, /maybe/ he recognizes it as you ignoring blacks because you've had other bad experiences with them. What can he do about that? Nothing, except chalk it up to you being a racist asshole. You're not going to teach anyone anything by being unethical. Man up, do the right thing, and quit your bitching.
If it just happens to be all blacks that do this, it's not the fault of the business owner or company for not servicing them or kicking them out.
You need to slow down and realize that the premise of your sentence is so ridiculous that it doesn't matter. You're not going to find a single thing that all blacks do that doesn't also overlap with someone of another race.
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Sciencing 28 points 2 hours ago[-]
This isn't about cabbies teaching all black people a "lesson" for not tipping or being imposing, this is simply the cabby trying to make the most money.
Stereotypes exist because they are more true than false. We unabashedly stereotype that kids who get higher scores on the SAT will be better students in college. Does every high-scoring kid do well in college? Fuck no! Some kids who are in the bottom 10% of SAT scores do very well in college! Does that mean we should scrap the system and ignore SAT? Of course not, because generally it is accurate, and in my opinion more importantly, it is one of the only tools colleges have to help them sift through candidates.
The cabby is in a similar situation. He sees a potential fare and must choose whether to stop for them or not. He doesn't have time to have a long lunch with the guy and figure out if he is a decent person or not, he has to make a judgement based on appearances while moving through traffic. If his experience shows that black people tend not to tip as well, isn't he the same as the college which favors high SAT scores over low ones? Stereotypes are just a predictive tool that we use when we don't have time to do a more exhaustive analysis.
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crashkg 45 points 4 hours ago[-]
I'm Indian and I have the hardest time trying to catch a cab in NYC, go figure. I have had a cab driver drive past me to pick up a white guy, sometimes the white guy will actually hold the door open for me and let me take the cab. Usually the cab driver gets pissed at this and I have even had one drive off rather than take me.
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BoonTobias 13 points 2 hours ago[-]
I am sorry for your lots but i can explain why this happens. Most cab drivers in nyc right now are from bangladesh, then pakistan, then african countries. The dudes who won't pick you up are most likely from bangladesh or pakistan because they believe indians are very cheap like jews.
I drove a cab for a few years when i used to go to college, I mean i still do but i used to too.
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Voduar 15 points 4 hours ago[-]
I recall a friend of mine who worked at Ruby Tuesday's describing a point about 2 years ago where they redid the menu to specifically cut down on black patrons. Everything was more expensive, and there was a cutback in fried chicken/bbq items. The wait staff was never happier. Not saying its right, but its definitely a commonly used strategy. Mind you, corporate did call it something else, for appearance.
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M3nt0R 67 points 4 hours ago[-]
I work at an applebees, and over 3/4 of the time the black people that order to go or dine in are the rudest people I've ever known. I'm super polite to them and I get nothing bot attitudes and demeaning remarks. Still I want to keep my job and corporate mindset is "money is money so stfu and keep working" because THEY don't have to deal with it. As for the tips? Non existant - microscopic, except in some cases where they actually tip really well but those are the exceptions.
Downvote me to hell, I'm speaking based on rational and repeated observance throughout THREE straight years of working in the same place. Different customers, same story.
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ucwords 1205 points 6 hours ago[-]
I think you're mistaking race for local subculture/demographics.
In your case, the demographic that is a perfect storm of poverty, ignorance, and entitlement in your immediate geographic vicinity happens to be black. If you applied the same restrictions in my neck of the woods, minus outright looking at skin color, about 90% of the trash you'd drive out would be white. Trash is trash. Do you think this might be the case?
TL; DR: Trash is trash, skin color is irrelevant.
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Kazzx 256 points 5 hours ago[-]
This is the answer here. I hope that if a white family acts up in your restaurant, you will throw them out too.
If I were you, I would quit thinking about what demographic I want to drive away, and focus on what demographic I wanted to attract. Changing music, menu, atmosphere aren't necessarily racist, but your mentality is.
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Krase 135 points 5 hours ago[-]
my dad once said "N*gger is just the black verison of white trash. Every color people has white trash, son. You just have to deal with all types as you can."
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reluctantracist [S] 325 points 5 hours ago[-]
If it had been Hispanics calling my wife names and dragging down my business, I'd have taken the same steps towards them. Or Indians, Chinese, or Caucasians. But the fact is, it was not. Many different groups eat at my restaurant, but only one has ever been enough of a problem that I took such drastic steps.
I'm not a sociologist, I can only speak from my own experience. This is what worked for me.
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JeffreyBShuflin 190 points 4 hours ago* [-]
I've waited tables in 5 different states and at many different levels of restaurants. Two of my good friends that I waited tables with are black and almost EVERYBODY in the business, from the busboys to the managers, agree; black customers are the worst. All of what you said is true. They are rude, demanding, and don't tip. I haven't had that problem with Chinese, Hispanic, or any other race. In fine dining, it's a lot less prevalent, but it still exists.
What made me decide to go back to school and not make a career in the restaurant business was after I waited on a group of 7 black people. I was working at a decently priced seafood restaurant in Houston Texas. Hurricane Katrina just hit New Orleans and Houston had a lot of Louisiana refugees. When that happened, my manager took up donations for the red cross to help the victims of Katrina. Everyone that I worked with pitched in more than they probably could afford... I know I did. About a week after Katrina I get a table of 7 black customers. I was a really good server and am far from racist. They were so freaking ghetto. Cussing loudly, making a huge mess with all their sugar packets and lemons that they were using to make restaurant lemonade (instead of just order the lemonade that was on the menu). They were running me harder than I remember any other table in the 12 years I worked in the business running me. At the end of the meal I bring them their tab (a table of 8 or more gets %18 gratuity added, 7 and you just have to hope for the best). Well... They all want separate checks. Okay... I go back and split up the checks even though people were splitting meals. So they get their checks... guess what they pay with. Freaking FEMA cards (these were the cards that Katrina evacuees were given to cover basic needs... the program that our whole staff donated to). They had a total tab of around $200. After they leave I go and start to clean up the disaster zone. Their table was a wrecked mess even though I did my best to keep it clean. Then I check the credit card receipts. 0$ tip! on every damn receipt... not a single tip. There was a dime and 2 penny's left on the table. I not only donated money to the system that they exploited to pay for their meal... but then they tip me 12 cents!!! I was furious! I turned my 2 weeks in the next day.
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ungulate 21 points 2 hours ago[-]
I live in Seattle. The black customers are just like any other customers here. Somewhat surprisingly, there is one demographic group here that meets the OP's description pretty well. They're nationals from a specific Asian country that I won't name, and only that country. They have the same reputation locally in restaurants as black people do in wherever the OP is from.
When a particular demographic are asshole customers, it's definitely a cultural thing, not a race thing.
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grumpywumps 128 points 4 hours ago* [-]
I'm black, and I always tip very well even if my server does a shitty job (which they usually do, because they already assume I'm not gonna tip). I never yell at anyone or hassle anyone. Nobody in my family does either. I see teenagers of every colour do that shit all the time but I don't see many places banning obnoxious teenagers...
Seeing this just makes makes me wonder why I even bother trying to be decent any more if everyone thinks I'm just a classless ghetto scumbag anyway.
edit: not saying I think I deserve a gold star for being polite and respectful to people, because that is ideally what all people should do - it just feels like a slap to the face to be repeatedly treated poorly for something I can't even control
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ass_fungus 101 points 3 hours ago[-]
I'm Asian. My mother always said that, as minorities, our actions tend to stick out more. Thus, in order to foster good sentiment towards people of your race, you should always be the best person you can be in order to offset the jackasses who bring down your name.
You keep on tipping well, and I'll keep on not driving a Honda Civic fitted with NOS :)
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node_n 32 points 3 hours ago[-]
this just makes makes me wonder why I even bother trying to be decent
I would presume because you are? If you're just putting on some kind of act that takes an effort to maintain, then I suggest you drop it and just be yourself.
If I became aware that I was being identified as belonging to a group (race, conference badge, tourist, clothing, etc.) of obnoxious assholes, I'd make an effort to distinguish myself from them in some way. I may speak or stand differently, maybe I would be extra polite, whatever I could reasonably do to change the perception of me belonging to that uncouth group.
Of course, it's a completely different deal if you actually do belong to that group. I have no advice for that scenario.
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Denny-Crane 5 points 3 hours ago[-]
Why? Because generations overlap, and stereotypes become weaker the more people encounter demonstrable counter-examples. You are engaging as an individual in behavior you think will benefit you collectively and relying on support from similar people. There will be free riders. There will be resistance. And your efforts won't be free. But you can still act in good faith, if you want.
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ktusznio 78 points 5 hours ago* [-]
Yes, but what ucwords is trying to say is that it's not a function of skin color, but of demographics and behavior. It simply happens that the cheap and obnoxious people in your area are black; they're not cheap and obnoxious as a result of being black. There's a big difference there.
It sounds to me that your restaurant was saved by good business decisions, and not because of racism. It only so happens that racism brought about the positive changes, which seems to be a stroke of luck in your case. If you were to do it all again, you could save your restaurant without resorting to racist justifications; you could simply make the same business decisions again without prejudice.
Another thing to note is that, presumably, a wealthier demographic returned to your restaurant as a result of an improving economic climate and the changes you yourself made to draw them in. This helped save your business. You mentioned that, at the time of the market crash, your old patrons disappeared. But somehow, a few months or years (you didn't say) later, people who could afford higher prices returned - folks of the same economic class who couldn't earlier afford your restaurant.
TL; DR: You saved your restaurant through good business decisions and the economic upturn helped. Racism didn't save your business, it simply helped you make the decisions that did.
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beachedwhale 30 points 5 hours ago[-]
If very nice, polite black customer ever shows up, enduring all of the hassle you throw at him/her with a smile, and tip well afterwards; what would you do?
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robo555 13 points 4 hours ago[-]
He won't find out because all the tables would have been reserved when the black customer shows up.
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rironin 183 points 5 hours ago[-]
But surely you understand that correlation doesn't equal causation here. They aren't problem customers because they are black, just as the Chinese aren't racially programmed to be good customers.
What you're doing is using this correlation that you've noticed, and now you're profiling based on the easy to identify bit (skin color) in hopes of excluding the bit you really want to exclude (assholes). This I can understand, even though it makes me really uncomfortable, and isn't moral.
Just don't forget the obvious - some Indian/Chinese/Caucasian customers have got to be bastards, some black customers would have been good customers. Your correlation isn't perfect. It's just a drastic step that you feel you had to take in order to save your business.
Right?
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tizz66 100 points 5 hours ago[-]
While I most certainly don't agree with the OPs stance, I do understand how he arrived at his conclusion that while not all black people are bad customers, all bad customers (if we take his word for it) were black, and that's what led him to do what he did. I don't think he's saying all black people are bad customers, just that he was prepared to exclude the good black customers to get rid of the bad ones.
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pholland167 40 points 5 hours ago[-]
I fully agree with your analysis. Even if objectively he knows that not all black people are bad customers, to his small, subjective world-view (not calling him small, just stating the inherent limitations of geography), the vast majority of his problem customers were black. It was worth it to his family and business to take necessary steps to eliminate those customers, even at the expense of otherwise good customers that shared a trait (in this case skin color) with the bad group. I think he understands that correlation doesn't equal causation, but as he dealt with the correlation, the desired result was achieved.
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msdesireeg 48 points 5 hours ago[-]
If me and my (black) boyfriend came in, what would happen?
I've had ten years of restaurant experience and understand where you are coming from, but like the guy above said, it's not really race that's the line of demarcation.
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AzureDrag0n1 31 points 4 hours ago[-]
I find black people who hang with white people tend not to behave like 'black culture' people. When a group of poorer black people hang together it is almost as if they are posturing to prove to their friends how badass they are. Which makes them look like assholes. When alone they suddenly lose asshole points.
To be fair though of the black people I have met 90% of them where pretty decent people but I lived in a more well of neighborhood.
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DarkShadowFox 48 points 4 hours ago[-]
You're absolutely right, the OP didn't get rid of blacks. He got rid of deadbeats and lowlifes who happened to be black. However, can you honestly disregard the fact that they were black? While that aspect may not have been the key factor, it is hard to ignore it as well.
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Nessie 26 points 3 hours ago[-]
the OP didn't get rid of blacks. He got rid of deadbeats and lowlifes who happened to be black.
By not seating black diners who had not misbehaved, he did more than get rid of deadbeats and lowlifes.
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zenslapped 155 points 5 hours ago[-]
Having been a waiter for many years, I can say that the OP is dead on. Sorry to those who wish to argue otherwise, but this stereotype definitely exists for a reason. We used to call them "spoda's" (as in "You mean we s'poda leave a tip?") Keep in mind Reddit is mainly politically correct, idealistic college kids who are generally intolerant to things that are counterculture to their campus propaganda. I know because I was there once too. Post something negative about Obama and watch the downvote attack for further proof. Well, glad to see you saved your business by not towing the industry's bullshit line about how the customer is always right - 'cause they sure as hell are not.
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myweedishairy 102 points 6 hours ago[-]
I agree with you, the ability for human beings to be disgusting degenerates is found in all races.
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amaxen 525 points 5 hours ago[-]
Speaking as a former waiter, I challenge you to find blacks who tip well and don't run your ass off. I've worked in upscale resturants and low, in the east and the west, and the fact remains there is something about black culture that leads to them being really lousy customers. It's not a subculture/demographic issue. It's a black culture issue. Of course, it's so unacceptable to mention, but try asking candidly someone who is a waiter that you know well as a friend. Black waiters who were friends of mine would outright refuse to wait on black middle/upper class customers.
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ghostchamber 105 points 5 hours ago[-]
I've got a friend who told me it was always more likely a table of black people would not tip. He's not, and has never, been a racist.
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sfgeek 95 points 4 hours ago* [-]
When I worked industry, even the black employees would fight with the other servers to not take a table of black people. Sad, but true.
I asked one of our black servers what he thought about it, his answer was pretty fascinating.
He said it's a viscous cycle, blacks definitely get poor service because of racism decades ago and as such, are offended by it and respond rudely, as well as don't tip. Then, this presumption of poor service actually does garner poor service, and eventually both parties are deadlocked. Waiters have plenty of evidence they will get little to no tip, and the black people know the waiter isn't going to make them a priority.
Edit: So I was thinking about a SOLUTION to this problem, because it's not a simple one. Both parties need to change for this to get better.
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nordic86 197 points 5 hours ago* [-]
There was a study that showed this is true.
Edit: I knew I was going to have to post a citation but out of laziness, I was hoping I wouldn't get called on it.
Published in the Journal of Applied Social Psychology Black-White Differences in Tipping of Various Service Providers
Published in Cornell HRA Quarterly Ethnic Differences in Tipping: A Matter of Familiarity with Tipping Norms
Feel free to rip these studies apart. All I said was that studies show this is the case.
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Cyphierre 30 points 4 hours ago[-]
I have spoken to many waiters and restaurant owners over the years, and I always like to ask them if they can size up their customers in advance and guess who will tip well. Everyone, without exception (even the black waiters), told me that blacks don't tip well.
I never asked about indicators of rowdiness or rudeness, just tipping.
On the other hand, I have never noticed that my black friends tip any less, generally, than my white/Asian/Latin friends.
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middlegeek 68 points 4 hours ago[-]
When I waited tables, I never received a single 15% tip from a black party. It was mostly 0 - 5% with a few bucking the trend and doing 20% or higher.
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dinalohan 97 points 4 hours ago[-]
And the ones who do tip 20% get called out by their black friends for trying to act white. lol.
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thetraincaboose 174 points 4 hours ago[-]
i've had 3 waiting jobs, both in a professional town and in a beach town.
the biggest tip i ever got was from a black family. they were great. the second biggest tip i ever got was from a black guy on a date with some white skanky bitch. he was obviously a drug dealer, and i gave them dessert for free, but still. basically gave me a 50% tip.
but... with that said, those are two exceptions to my experience. black people just overwhelmingly don't tip for shit. if you get anything, you get a dollar or two. i know why they think that, "i come to this restaurant and pay all this money for the food and then have to pay MORE? uh-uh, that ain't my job..." but i also have the same mentality which is why i don't go to fucking restaurants where tipping is required.
hostesses knew all this and would try to spread the black people as equally as possible among the wait staff so nobody would get pissed. tempers heat up in restaurants sometimes, and a couple of the biggest fits i've ever seen in that setting came about from someone getting two tables of black people in a row.
i'm being as objective as possible here, and EVERY SINGLE waiter/waitress i have ever discussed it with feels the same way. i think the term "racism" applies here, but i don't think it's negative. there really is a cultural phenomenon among racial lines that involves stiffing waiters across the country. if it's racist and wrong to try to call them out for essentially stealing money from the waiter (we get paid $2/hr and literally live off tips) then fuck it, i might as well just go join the klan.
yeah, fuck political correctness too while we're at it.
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Dr_Poofist 86 points 4 hours ago[-]
My ex was a waitress and she told me she liked black tips the best.
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captainlavender 164 points 3 hours ago[-]
She wasn't talking about her job, dude. Sorry.
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bimbambaby 22 points 2 hours ago[-]
Oh I see, these are all jokes about penises.
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AhmedF 22 points 3 hours ago[-]
I think it was more than just the tip
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modivate 20 points 3 hours ago[-]
That's because she wasn't able to fit the whole thing in
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ceightlin 33 points 4 hours ago[-]
I've got a friend who is a waitress, and she pretty much talks to me about everything, from school to work, and she's told me on a few occasions that black people just don't tip well. She's not racist at all, and she's an extremely good person. It's just from her experience as a waitress.
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fergusmck 8 points 4 hours ago[-]
Can we expect to see you in r/RelationshipAdvice soon?
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KnoxCrew02 29 points 4 hours ago[-]
This man speaks the truth... I've been a waiter for 3 years.
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thefootballchick 159 points 4 hours ago[-]
I'm black, and me and my family tip at least 15%, unless of course the service was terrible.
I think being loud, is a cultural thing. Many of our baby boomer parents grew up with a bunch of other siblings and that just makes them talk louder. Naturally, the kids are loud too since the parents are. In my family, we like to have fun and laugh all the time. If we are at a restaurant where that would be rude, we keep it down.
You can't generalize the whole race based on a few experiences. There are always bad apples in every bunch.
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FactsAhoy 31 points 4 hours ago[-]
It doesn't sound like he was reporting on just a few experiences. It was a continuing trend that several people had been tolerating and then revealed to each other when they finally talked about it.
Whether being loud is a cultural thing or not, it happens. And there's nothing racist about objecting to that behavior. I don't come to a restaurant to YELL AT MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY. Somehow a lot of people manage to have fun and laugh without irritating the living shit out of an entire establishment (not that you're doing this either).
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EllipsisNazi 177 points 4 hours ago[-]
I'm black, and I've stopped eating out so often because I don't want to deal with the ditzy, entitled, white twentysomething waitress who gives me poor service (e.g. eye rolling, tossing silverware) and an attitude because she thinks I'm not going to tip her well.
The last few places this has happened I've tipped 15-20% and simply never gone back. Asshole waitresses can absolutely ruin a dining experience. I bet they don't think we see the look of disdain when they make eye contact with us, either. Or maybe they just don't care.
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Altaco 127 points 3 hours ago[-]
Sounds like it might be a bit of a vicious cycle in that regard.
Blacks tip less often -> waiters respect them less -> less likely to tip -> less respect, etc.
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subheight640 14 points 4 hours ago[-]
Hooray self fulfilling prophesy.
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adelaide_7 340 points 5 hours ago[-]
I'm black and I tip 20% all the time.
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Ohioho 494 points 4 hours ago[-]
I believe you internet man
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adelaide_7 80 points 4 hours ago[-]
I have no idea how to prove otherwise :)
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RgyaGramShad 20 points 2 hours ago[-]
Well, we could start with photos of you tipping, scans of the receipt so we can prove you're tipping 20%, and not 20.03% or something, and we'll also need a notarized certificate of blackness.
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adelaide_7 39 points 2 hours ago[-]
Well I'm on reddit, so they revoked my certification. But, I've doubled my consumption of watermelon and fried chicken so I'm expecting it back any day now.
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TrevX9 37 points 3 hours ago[-]
Well props to you all the same. I'm white and I usually only tip 15% plus or minus 5% based on the actual service =/
You win.
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jawkneeman 152 points 4 hours ago[-]
You're also on Reddit, and, for the most part, ignorant stereotypical ghetto black people don't choose to browse Reddit and sites like it.
P.S. Thank you.
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adelaide_7 120 points 4 hours ago[-]
I've seen other black people on Reddit. Also, I'm not the only black person who tips. Stereotypes infuriate me, especially when people are convinced that they can't not be true.
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-spacecat- 8 points 3 hours ago[-]
Does it feel strange to open up an IAMA thread and be told resoundingly that you are a shitty tipper by people who will never know you, and based only on your supposed skin color? I'd imagine that it would.
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adelaide_7 12 points 3 hours ago[-]
It feels really, really shitty. The worst part is, it seems like there is nothing I can do about it.
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whirlingderv 42 points 4 hours ago[-]
I've worked in a Red Lobster, and a budget family-style restaurant and dealt with my fair share of low tips from black customers. Now I work in the restaurant of a 4-star business-traveler hotel and serve many black guests a day whose tips are commensurate with white guests'. We do have black people who tip lousy and run your ass off, but these are almost exclusively guests who booked rooms through discount websites, and their tips are generally the same as many of the white people who also booked discounted rooms. In my case, among the lowest tippers are Caucasian western Europeans (because tips aren't customary in most parts of Europe, and if they are, 5-10% is perfectly acceptable).
I would argue that there IS something about a particular subculture, unless you are arguing that cheap, obnoxious black people are the "real" black people, and generous, polite black people aren't "black" enough to fit the standard.
ALSO Regardless of race, FAMILIES WITH YOUNG KIDS ARE THE WORST TIPPERS. It is really terrible that they take the stresses of their tight budget out on their servers. It isn't our fault they have to save for college for three kids, or that the latest PS3 is so expensive. If you can't afford to pay for a meal for your family + 15-20% extra for a tip, you need to choose a cheaper restaurant or eat out at a picnic.
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ozzyvixen 12 points 3 hours ago[-]
Families are the worst. Why does everything have to be so goddamned family friendly?
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kettal 7 points 3 hours ago[-]
The whole tipping culture needs to end. Just put the tip in the price of the food like is done is Europe, Australia, etc.
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BlazedAndConfused 132 points 6 hours ago[-]
While I don't condone racism at all either, I totally understand where you're coming from. I served tables for 4 years while going through college. I have a few great 'black' friends, but when it came to tables, I hated them.
The cultural differences are enormous. Whether it's due to their peers, upbringing, foods, or something else, the way a majority of African American's interact in the restaurant industry is appalling.
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chrispyb 147 points 4 hours ago[-]
sounds like your friends were
....sunglasses.....
niggardly
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whosdamike 51 points 5 hours ago[-]
I have a few great 'black' friends
Feels like you misplaced the quotation marks here.
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coffy 62 points 4 hours ago* [-]
Seriously. I'm black and even I know most black people don't tip well. Almost every single time I go out in a group, come time for the tip, there's a weird awkwardness to lay down cash.
It's gross.
It's a damn shame, but I do try my best to turn that stereotype around.
There's a sketch on Louie that illustrates this quite well.
edit: I have to also add, that you did nothing ethically wrong. If I lived in an area where a lot of white people flew rebel flags and treated black people like shit, I'd do my best to keep those people away from me. That's just common sense.
And honestly? You didn't turn away anyone, simply for being black. I think if I showed up, adhered to your dress-code, spoke politely, and made a reservation, waitresses might be nervous that I wouldn't tip, but I would still get served and happily surprise them in the end.
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IllBeBack 5 points 3 hours ago[-]
Well, at the OP's restaurant, you would get surprised in the end with an automatic 15% tip.
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imaletyoufinishbut 8 points 3 hours ago[-]
If hes breaking the stereotype, he should go 15% + 10%. Then the waitress would have that one story about the black guy that tipped her 25%. Thats how stereotypes get spread.. by word of mouth.
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laylamerck 241 points 6 hours ago[-]
Blacks are stereotypically the bane of the food service industry. I don't know why this is, but on a personal level, from my experiences in college, I have found them as a group to be horrible customers about 80% of the time I served them.
Why can't rappers talk about polite ordering behavior and adequate restaurant public decorum? Weezy + Emily Post = an album I would legally obtain.
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electrolemon 145 points 4 hours ago* [-]
"Yo, we hit up Magianno's in our finest threads
Wait politely for the waiter to bring us some bread
Chow down on foie gras, calmly talk with my bros
Then we pay for our meals, and tip a Benjamin, yo"
I bet that would sell way more than "SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS"
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Joshua_Falkner 235 points 5 hours ago* [-]
NPR actually had a discussion on why most black people are poor restaurant patrons. One of the theories stated that since black people weren't allowed in white restaurants until the late 60's they never really learned proper dining etiquette... having worked in restaurants, I'd say 40 years is long enough to learn...
EDIT: NPR Link courtesy of somesortaorangefruit
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somesortaorangefruit 53 points 5 hours ago[-]
Found the NPR story, it was pretty interesting.
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=1329241
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rospaya 108 points 5 hours ago[-]
Good manners aren't genetic damnit.
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megadeus 187 points 5 hours ago[-]
But they are passed on from parent to child.
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rm999 75 points 5 hours ago[-]
Yes and no. My parents came to this country when they were 21 from a country that didn't have restaurants and they have great manners. You learn these things from society also.
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CACuzcatlan 15 points 4 hours ago[-]
What country doesn't have restaurants?
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ltjboy03 35 points 4 hours ago[-]
In Soviet Russia, restaurant visits you.
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AnnArchist 139 points 6 hours ago[-]
Movie Theaters. . .
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FuckingJerk 111 points 5 hours ago[-]
When i worked at Loew's we'd usually fill 1 bag of trash or so from the aisles for your average sold out show. For black movies we needed 4-5. Every fucking time.
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reddit_dot_com 46 points 4 hours ago[-]
Since we're all telling the truth here... I always go 20 miles out of the way to go to movies in a predominantly white area, because my experience in the local "Urban" theater has always been terrible due to the other patrons.
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harsesus 50 points 3 hours ago[-]
On the other hand, if you know what you are walking into, watching a black movie in an urban theater can be quite a fun experience, what with all the audience participation. Two shows for the price of one.
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Wutang_financial 12 points 3 hours ago[-]
Movie theatre worker for 3 years. Can confirm this is the truth.
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ropeyhodges 61 points 5 hours ago[-]
I don't want to encourage a stereotype here, but I worked in a 2nd run movie theater which was showing three movies targeting the African American market simultaneously.
In addition to people smoking weed and pouring gasoline on theater seats (seriously, who does that?), someone took his shit out of the toilet and smeared it all over the mens' bathroom. Mirrors, tiles, everything.
I really don't have words to describe it.
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bozleh 19 points 4 hours ago[-]
WTF who carries around a jerry can of gas?
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JustTrustMeOnThis 74 points 5 hours ago[-]
Curse you for bringing up memories of rage filled evenings with "oh no you di-int bitch" blurted out behind me....and a nice steady glow of cell phones in front of me.
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belladonnadiorama 11 points 4 hours ago[-]
I actually used to enjoy going to scary movies where I knew there were large crowds of black kids were going to be (this was in college).
They were the loudest in saying "Run Bitch, run for your life, he's behind you! He's behind you! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!"
That was hilarious to me.
Now I live in an area where there isn't as much diversity. No more fun to be had at the movies.
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rpater 108 points 5 hours ago[-]
I used to work in food service at a Chili's, and I know that even the black servers tried to get out of having to serve black customers because of complaints about the tips.
However, I do think a HUGE part of the problem is that the stereotype exists so the servers treat the black folks like shit. Because they were treated like shit, the black folks give a shitty tip and the cycle repeats.
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w00t4me 70 points 5 hours ago[-]
My Girlfriend works at a major chain restaurant and she has come home in tears multiple times because of black patrons. when she first started she treated them like every other customer but she slowly learned that they don't tip much, often not at all. she once had a group of 20 blacks in and she waited on them all night, only to have them split up the checks with most of them not tipping at all and none tipping more than 5% despite the fact most paid with cash. she said over half even asked for exact change back.
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zomgsauce 48 points 5 hours ago[-]
Fuckin' Canadians...
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HectaMan 35 points 4 hours ago[-]
For those of you who have not worked in food service; this is "kitchen lingo" for African american diners.
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phirate 17 points 4 hours ago[-]
I love that that is the 'code' for black people.
I'm Canadian, from BC, and I very rarely come into contact with black people. When I do they are almost always extremely polite. Even the ones wearing the stereotypical clothing that would have people judging them poorly have always been great to deal with in my experience.
Most people I know around here are more likely to be wary of Indian customers. The ones the go out in their hugenormous family groups. They are going to be a trial. When they start asking for discounts you can kiss any hopes of a tip good-bye.
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Dax420 46 points 3 hours ago[-]
BC'er here too. Somehow Canada got all the nice, polite, well educated black people. Don't know how we pulled it off, but I have honestly never met a single "ghetto" black person in Canada.
Saddest thing I've ever seen in my life was this little black boy crying his eyes out at the airport departures terminal. You could tell they were from the southern US from their accents. I heard the little boy say "No mom, I don't wanna go home. Everyone here is so NICE to us!"
I cried. I can't even imagine how tough that little boy's life has been that he is crying because he has to go back home and deal with racism again. It was such a strange feeling of being both proud to be Canadian and ashamed to be human at the same time.
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IH8DwnvoteComplainrs 10 points 2 hours ago[-]
Holy shit.
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Zagrobelny 50 points 6 hours ago[-]
Can't you just have a no asshole policy? You might have to kick out some white people too, but it might help you sleep better.
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TRUBored 445 points 6 hours ago[-]
This feels trollish.
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Vellon221 315 points 6 hours ago[-]
Specifically when he mentioned removing fried chicken.
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tbone42617 274 points 5 hours ago[-]
And the part where his regulars that stopped coming because the economy tanked suddenly started coming again at much higher prices, just because he got rid of the black people.
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LinuxFreeOrDie 85 points 4 hours ago[-]
Exactly, he never established why it saved his business. Why did business pick up?
As far as I can tell, the only reason for getting rid of black people was because they tip and behave badly, they don't actually cause you to lose business from other patrons. Why would the regulars come back because there are no blacks? Are they are racist too? It makes no sense.
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EthnicMismatch644 30 points 3 hours ago[-]
Why would the regulars come back because there are no blacks? Are they are racist too? It makes no sense.
Dunno if the OP is a troll or not, but I can identify with this comment. Back where I used to live, there was three movie theaters. They were all pretty nice (nice seats, good screens, etc), but one was the "cut rate" theater. My friends and I stopped going to it because it had the highest instances of people yelling at the screen while the movie was playing. My observation was that the people yelling during the show were always black.
And if I heard that that theater took measures to keep the yelling from happening, I'd go back. I don't care what the measures are. It could be as simple as being strict about kicking people out when it happens. But the theater could also employ tactics like the poster here. Whatever the solution, it will at least bring back some customers.
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ggggbabybabybaby 31 points 3 hours ago[-]
Yeah, that made me raise an eyebrow too.
Regulars are gone, only blacks are left and you threw them out
???
PROFIT
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bowling4meth 66 points 5 hours ago[-]
To be fair, if it was a troll he'd have removed watermelon as well.
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Vellon221 30 points 5 hours ago[-]
trolling is a art
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Rye22 18 points 5 hours ago[-]
That was the "bel-air" moment, so to speak.
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buddhahat 120 points 5 hours ago[-]
totally feels troll-ish. Reads like an email FWD from my racist uncle. Seems half apologetic and reluctant but the gosh darned honest to god truth is that the blacks cause problems.
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htownhustla 14 points 4 hours ago[-]
evidence?
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cory849 60 points 5 hours ago[-]
I think It's very clearly a troll. Likely the same troll that likes to write all the other creative fiction in IAMA. Everybody needs a hobby.
Reddit's core demographic does not really include busy married restauranteurs, who learn the reddit system so well that they know about IAMA and decide to kill time doing one.
There's some guy out there who really likes coming up with scenarios that will drive an IAMA discussion.
Also - can we not have the "but he doesn't even get link karma" discussion. People do things like this for attention and for feelings of satisfaction.
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tryk48s 13 points 5 hours ago[-]
This feels tailor made for reddit. And the answers don't really feel like they're coming from a real restaurant owner.
I call bullshit.
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lovethebomb 80 points 5 hours ago[-]
I agree. This is troll bait. I think the reason the OP is pulling this shit is to suggest and enforce an unfortunate black stereotype in such a manner that involves the survival of his family. That puts everyone in a sympathy mode. This was used often in westerns where the massacre of the indians was justified by having them kill white family members at the beginning of the film. Then the revenge motif could bring out the bloodlust in the most mild mannered grandma.
What OP is doing is framing horrific discrimination, which the civil rights movement made illegal, into a justifiable, even reasonable practice, given that his precious wife had to endure insults and, by god, he won't let his daughter get (metaphorically) raped by these loud, rude, angry, noisy, messy black men. (with big penises).
This is disgusting mindfuckery. You've all been had.
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jillzor 10 points 4 hours ago[-]
Yeah, the part about his kids quitting school for a semester... I don't know about that. And who tries to compete with applebee's and chili's? Don't they have a monopoly on putting annoying shit on the walls already?
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a_Tick 326 points 6 hours ago[-]
Raising prices, changing the menu, and throwing out rude and disrespectful customers are your prerogatives. Adding a dress code is, in my opinion, a little strange. Lying about mandatory gratuity is pretty low, and refusing to seat black customers (and not even being honest about the reason) is unconscionable.
Being familiar with your customers and treating them on a case by case basis is one thing, and as someone who used to work in the service industry I wish more places would refuse to roll over for self-entitled jerkwads. Refusing service based solely on skin color is another thing entirely.
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hoboballs 29 points 5 hours ago[-]
The dress code thing is very common here in Houston.
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CountlessOBriens64 37 points 5 hours ago[-]
Agreed. Some of these policies are a great idea and needn't even be considered racist. It's the policies that actually ARE racist that need to go. This way, he won't feel as racist or BE as racist, and the company still prospers!
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klln_u_qckly 134 points 6 hours ago[-]
I don't agree with your methods, but I understand that people do what they have to do to survive. Kudos for saving the business but I would personally stop adding the 15 percent gratuity to only black people. That is the part that I consider the real problem. Appealing to a different crowd is one thing to target a race with an extra charge is crossing the line.
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valadil 60 points 6 hours ago[-]
I agree. I don't think there's anything wrong with throwing out rude customers and raising prices. I do have a problem with treating people differently on sight.
Anyway, OP, has this changed how you act towards black people when you're not in the restaurant? I'd speculate that once you start deliberately using prejudice like this that more would follow.
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reluctantracist [S] 95 points 6 hours ago[-]
It's a constant fight with myself to reconcile the fact that these are individual human beings with their own, valid way of life, and the fact that I see so much incredibly horrible behavior from so many of them directed at young women who are trying their best to put themselves through school, raise a kid, or just earn an honest dollar. It's not easy to just put those experiences away and treat everyone like an equal when you've been burned many times.
I guess a good way to put it would be, last month I stopped to help a black guy change his tire (he didn't have a tire iron or a jack! who drives like that?), but I was very careful at first to make sure it wasn't a setup, and I wasn't surprised when he hit me up for money.
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pillage 84 points 5 hours ago[-]
It's a constant fight with myself to reconcile the fact that these are individual human beings with their own, valid way of life
Fuck that. If calling your wife a dumb bitch is their way of life then it's wrong.
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SupaFurry 88 points 4 hours ago[-]
A single human being said that. Not the entirety of black people.
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EntiretyOfBlackFolk 157 points 4 hours ago[-]
You'd be surprised.
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Megatron_McLargeHuge 18 points 3 hours ago[-]
This account has potential.
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NerdBot9000 10 points 4 hours ago[-]
A single human being said it and his family all laughed. This is not a polite family. I can't speculate further than that.
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FuriousATG 33 points 6 hours ago[-]
Agreed - this could get you in serious trouble. Apply the 15 percent gratuity across the board, and make the sign bigger so that people will see it coming in, if you intend for it to discourage some.
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reluctantracist [S] 44 points 6 hours ago[-]
I'm aware that I could actually run into trouble for this one, so I will probably discontinue the practice before long. The only reason I'm still doing it is that my servers absolutely love it.
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klln_u_qckly 40 points 6 hours ago[-]
Then as FuriousATG said, I would make a bigger sign and apply it to everyone. Bet your servers would like that even more.
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bubbal 79 points 6 hours ago[-]
I doubt it. If a restaurant places a 15-18% gratuity on my check, I'll usually just use that, otherwise, I'll generally tip 20-22% for good service.
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klln_u_qckly 12 points 6 hours ago[-]
Yeah I tip pretty good myself but depending on the area a steady 15-18% might be better than the gamble with the regular customers.
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AuhsojSivart 10 points 6 hours ago[-]
Then just apply it to everyone.
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dopaliciousangel 15 points 3 hours ago[-]
Would it kill you to insert the word "Most" or "Some" when you talk about an entire race of people?
I am black. I tip 20% at every restaurant. I am not noisy nor do I leave messes at the table. I don't have a car and so I use cabs a lot. If my fare is below $10, I add a $3.00 tip. If my fare is above $10, I tip 20%. So I do not fit the overgeneralizing statements you make that black diners are messy, noisy, and frequent complain. If you had said "MOST blacks diners are..." then I would not be offended by your actions.
I'm truly sorry that I cannot get every black person in America in one room and tell them to start tipping like every other race. Even if I could, I cannot follow around every black person in a cab or restaurant to be sure that they tip you like they should. Thanks to people like you when I eat at a restaurant, I actually act overly nice and never complain even if my food tastes like shit. Thanks to racist cab drivers, I have had to walk home many a night in rough neighborhoods due to no fault of my own. That is the fucked up part about racism. Your racist actions actually punish an innocent person just because of how they were born which is something they cannot control. Almost every comment in this post proves what MOST black people think about MOST white people: MOST white people are racist. See how much better that sounds?
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OldTimeGentleman 21 points 6 hours ago[-]
I think what you really did and the reason why you saved the business is that you made it appealing to a much wealthier crowd of customers, and you say it's because of their race, even if it's not true. If you stopped the racism altogether, you'd probably start noticing a lot more nice black people, because they are richer. If Obama came for dinner, he would behave well. If the ambassador from an African country came, it would be the same thing. My advice if you want to feel better about yourself is to give all customers a check without the gratuity included, and if they don't tip enough, hand them a new one adding the gratuity. I heard a lot of stories of restaurants doing that. Then, just let every customer in regardless of their race, and if they behave badly, ban them. As in never, ever let them in again. If your city is not too big, you shouldn't have too many problems.
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anansiboy 13 points 3 hours ago[-]
I am black, well educated, well mannered and routinely tip over 20%. I do not like loud customers of any ethnic group. I have been to many places where there is some loud white guy berating and bullying his family and I don't like it any more than anybody else. I am not sure if reluctantracist's policies are illegal or not but I would be careful about the way he applies the tip policy. As far as raising prices, changing music, and demanding courtesy from customers; it all seems race neutral if not class neutral. I do not care what my waiters feelings are for me if I get good service. I like a place or I do not. I treat people well and if I get an attitude, I leave and bad mouth the place to my friends. I am sorry that certain groups of people have caused grief but I always notice that white people treat non whites as a collective where as other white people are treated as individuals.
By and large I have not had many issues of racism in my life but I do recognize that I never get the benefit of the doubt, no matter how clean cut and polite I am. I am not particularly offended by this post as I have seen it before. I am too tired to be offended by all the casual hatred of people you see in life. I see Obama getting slammed all the time even though he is more successful and better educated than 99% of Americans, people still talk about him as if he were some sort of drug dealer that conned America. Oh Well. Just stay off my porch and do not get in the way of my life and I will shrug my shoulders.
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pigjargon 10 points 4 hours ago[-]
You said that your kids and your wife work there, as well as yourself, but surely all 4 of you cannot be there all the time.
So you basically sat down all of your wait staff in a meeting and told them about the new "policies"... including giving orders to the hosts/hostesses "Hey, if a black family walks in, keep them waiting". How exactly did that go over with your staff?
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Lucavious 28 points 5 hours ago[-]
I'm confused by how you reacted. It sounds like you primarily had issues with:
People yelling at your family.
People being rude and noisy.
People being cheap.
And while in your situation those things were being done by black people, I don't see why you had to target them specifically. You can kick out people being rude, noisy, and raise your prices without targeting anyone specifically right?
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blueboybob 30 points 6 hours ago[-]
Lets say an African American couple come in. He is in a suit with a tie, she in a nice blouse. They pull up in a lexus, obviously just getting off of work. Do you still do this? Or is it more only the ones that "look" like they may cause a problem?
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TrollingThunder 44 points 4 hours ago[-]
Lock the fucking doors and call the cops. Drug dealers are terrible for business.
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anonid 15 points 4 hours ago[-]
Trolling IAmA really is like taking candy from babies
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smoore701 18 points 6 hours ago[-]
What is your best selling menu item?
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reluctantracist [S] 40 points 6 hours ago[-]
The humble cheeseburger. No matter how good the specials are, it's the backbone of our menu. Our patties are handmade, we use fresh sourdough buns, you can get it with cheddar, feta, swiss, Brie, or Gruyère. We do not serve 'American' cheese on anything! Most popular toppings are Bacon, then sautéed onions, then probably avocado.
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AuhsojSivart 140 points 6 hours ago[-]
you can get it with...
Not if you're black, apparently.
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ill1234567890 10 points 5 hours ago[-]
Do you think you could have accompished the same thing by treating everyone equally? Raising prices and changing the menu can make your resturant more "upscale". Of course you should throw out rude customers! If your waiters are not making enough money then it is fine to make a 15% tip manitory for everyone. Now it might be that you get less black customers this way, but surely everyone will be polite and tip which is what is important.
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electrolemon 75 points 4 hours ago[-]
As an African American male, I would just like to say that you did the right thing.
Maybe I'm just living out that one Dave Chapelle skit, but I cannot stand a majority of the black people I come across. They almost always stick to stereotypes, and they're loud, obnoxious, and annoying. Plus, they do pull the race card as frequently as you'd think. I'm generally respectable and reserved, and I don't fit the stereotype of a black person in many ways (many of my friends frequently joke that I'm not a black person because of this) but I understand what you did. If anything, this rule shouldn't just be for black people, it should be for all assholes and trash like that.
It's saying things like this that make me question whether or not I'm actually racist against black people, despite being black myself.
TL;DR: I'm black. You done good, honky.
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EllipsisNazi 7 points 3 hours ago[-]
As an African American male, I would just like to say that you did the right thing.
I was fine with it up until the part about fake reservations.
Eliminate a particular demographic through pricing and menu changes? Fine.
See a "black" person walk in and make them wait longer to be seated just because of their skin color? That I have a problem with, and I hope you do too.
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lectrick 27 points 5 hours ago[-]
This is annoying, but being a white guy with a handful of black friends (who do not act as I'm about to describe), it certainly seems like a 3+ group of black people is almost always going to be the loudest group in the room. (I don't know about the manners thing, that's just class, and class is blind.) Maybe it has to do with knowing you're the minority and therefore having to embiggen your presence? i.e. it's not a black thing it's a minority thing and perhaps a small group of white people in a largely black establishment would act the same way.
Regardless of that, I think you're correlating a bit much. When you start to stereotype, you automatically start performing confirmation bias. You ignore the obnoxious groups of white people and the polite group of black people to support your thesis (that black people cost more and are more trouble).
What you did by raising prices was raise the required minimum class to eat at your establishment. The fact that this ended up shutting out a bunch of black people is just circumstantial. Maybe it occurred to you that the reason why you're doing better is because you raised prices, not because you discouraged black people from eating there? As a web developer, my clients got way way better once I raised prices. It's ironic! But you're pricing yourself into better clientele, basically... Regardless of race.
TL;DR You aimed at black people but you actually fired low-class people, which is not the same thing.
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Bonervista 11 points 5 hours ago[-]
Upvote for embiggen
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syntacticalhiccups 6 points 2 hours ago[-]
I smell a troll. This stinks of white supremacist propaganda, wrapped up in such a way to make people think of it as rational or reasonable because of the candid and anecdotal delivery. Remember all the incidents of white supremacists posting to reddit? Yeah, me thinks this is one.
None of what this guy did is rational from a business perspective and this story if far too stereotypical to believe, ie taking fried chicken off the menu or "upity-ness" or loud voices. See this shit for what it is.
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ifiwasntintherapgame 8 points 3 hours ago[-]
So just to recap:
Your prices were low
Economic downturn, rise in price for food, operating costs, etc
Your (white?) regulars left
Blacks came in, being priced out of the places they used to eat
You raised prices, removed fried chicken from the menu, etc
Blacks left
(White?) regulars returned to the higher prices they couldn't afford before they had been raised in the first place?
Is that correct?
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eZek0 8 points 4 hours ago[-]
Instead of just kicking out all blacks, why not just kick out ones when they are being douchebags like the group you described that you kicked out?
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the_ouskull 73 points 5 hours ago[-]
This isn't a StateYourOpinion, it's an AskMeAnything. Why don't you people make with the f*ckin' questions...?
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evolve81 13 points 4 hours ago[-]
What do you mean you people?
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firekid123 69 points 4 hours ago* [-]
Reading this makes me hate Reddit right now. As a person who had something similar done to them when I was younger because of my skin color, this makes me pissed to read everyone cheering you on. My waiters pulled the "make them wait for an hour game", and when you're little you don't really understand it. But my parents told me I'd get more racism as I got older.
It's weird when people make stereotypes of you and your family and then hate you for it, or think less of you (especially when you have to live with all the negative associations that aren't true to yourself).
Anyways, I think what you're doing is terribly wrong. For the group you're hurting, they probably know. As I said, my dad told me to expect it, and it's fairly obvious (but at the same time there is little you can do).
Also, all black people don't act that way, I'm sorry you've only experienced ones who do. As far as I know, from my gigantic family, it's a personality thing not a group think thing.
I don't get how some people feel that they're right in discriminating because of bad experiences. I've had experiences of racism from other cultural groups and I don't go hating everyone for it. I don't hate white people because of the racism I sometimes get from individuals, I don't think less of the whole white race. I do however think less of the person.
Reddit, I am dissapoint.
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minor9sharp11 18 points 4 hours ago[-]
I don't believe this story because of the fried chicken reference.
This is a troll post by a Libertarian.
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haujob 171 points 5 hours ago[-]
I know this is more of a "good job; saved restaurant" thread, but let's talk about racism a bit, you ignorant fucks. (Don't worry, I put that in there so you can use it against me. Touche, motherfuckers.)
There's this great quote from this so-so film named "Deep Cover". Fishburn and Goldbloom were in it. Anyway, the quote is, "What's the difference between a nigger and a black man?"
"The nigger's the one that won't answer that question."
Your sensibilities hurt yet? Fuck it. Imma keep going.
I was a server for 8 years. Moved into managing the same concept I worked at for 2 more. 10 years in the bloody industry. And you know what? You know what was fucking universal? No one wanted the black tables. Not even the black servers.
Is that racism or pure, fucking, brutal honesty? Sometimes a spade is really a fucking spade? (Bonus for additional slur!)
In both my home (New Orleans) and here (Omaha/Lincoln), we all knew better. We weren't jackass racists, we weren't bigots, we were fucking business people. We (and later my employees) made money off tips. The restaurant made money off the meals. If I were to recount the disproportionate amount of black tables I had to comp, would that be racism or pure, rank, fucking math? Money lost is money lost, motherfuckers.
Part of the problem here is that no one will deal with this "numbers" thing. It's true. It's real. It fucking happens. Disproportionate to any other race. When no one allows a businessperson to deal with the realities of how fucked up race relations are in this country, we are not going in the right direction.
The U.S. has laws against discrimination. Yea. Are we not past that point? Blacks are still second class citizens? They can't be accountable for their own behaviour? We have to accommodate them no matter what, because we are benevolent and they NEED our help?
Fuck that. Fuck you. That's racism.
If they can't wear the big boy pants, yeah, they can't fucking play.
Are they niggers, or are they black? Funny thing: they are the only ones that can make that call. I'm not going to keep treating them like children by making it for them. The U.S. should be past that. I'm past that.
If you want to play the race card to get a free meal, if you want to be that Jewish table that busts out their 10% conversion card, if you want to be that ignorant-about-U.S.-tipping Scandinavian, fuck you. Fuck you all.
But don't act like a princessy little bitch when someone wants to do something about it. Or you think there should be "protected" classes because they can't stand up for themselves.
It's called balls, it's called brains, it's called civility. Some just don't have it.
Disproportionately.
If you can't handle that white elephant, well, that's why ole boy and many other folk are in the same boat. No one want's how it really is. The projects are disproportionately black. The prisons are disproportionately black. North Omaha and The lower 9th Ward (back home) are disproportionately black.
The tables no one wants are disproportionately black.
Why can't any of you be better than Obama and instead of giving a (yes, great) speech about race, have an actual fucking conversation about it? Talk to the things that really, really fucking exist.
But no. You call "racism" and are done with it, like the smug little fuck you want to be.
Well, good on you. Call us out. Call us racists. You do whatever you have to to help you sleep at night.
While 12% of the United States' population wonders why you HAVE to rush to their aid, why you won't treat them like adults.
I'm sure that's what helps them sleep better at night. Knowing that you got their back. So they don't have to try. So they don't have to care. So they don't have to grow up.
So we can keep having this conversation and you can keep feeling smug.
You ignorant fucks.
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pokeyjones 25 points 2 hours ago[-]
I only skimmed this... but any self respecting Jew can figure a 10% tip without a conversion card.
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handlit33 28 points 4 hours ago[-]
I feel like you're holding back a bit. Can you rewrite this without holding back?
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ProfessorRiffs 100 points 4 hours ago[-]
It's so edgy of you to say so many fucks.
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nom-nom-nom 33 points 6 hours ago[-]
Almost all of them were far noisier than our other customers, complained more, left huge messes and microscopic tips, when they tipped at all. She told me if we could just get rid of them, the place would actually be a joy to work at.
Sad but true.
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mlwarren88 9 points 6 hours ago[-]
Do you think you would ever go back to being more "black friendly" or is this a permanent thing for your business?
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austex_mike 23 points 4 hours ago[-]
I am black. I am extra nice to wait staff because I know how hard that job is. I also tip very well, and I would never call a waitress a dumb bitch. I speak four languages, have travelled to 30 countries, and I love to chat with the people who serve me because I know that many of them have interesting personal stories. If they are foreign and I speak their language, I try to talk to them in their native tongue.
If I walked into your restaurant with Clarence Thomas, Colin Powell and Barak Obama would you lie to us and tell us there are not seats or a long wait because we were black? If so you would have missed out on having decent, paying customers just because you have made a sweeping generalization about the color of our skin.
Just because you have certain experiences with a certain group does not give you carte blance to discriminate against everyone that color. In that case I would never do business with short-haired, middle aged, white women again. For whatever reason in my old job these middle aged white women were the WORST to deal with. But I haven't painted the whole demographic with a wide brush.
In my old job selling computers some of my fellow salesmen used to call Asians "Ori-RENTals" because there was a perception that Asians always returned things. My first sale of a group of laptops to a group of Asians resulted in half of them being returned within the week. I guess at that point I could have painted all Asians with a wide brush, but that would have been disrespectful of the Asians that did not act in such a way.
In summary, just take race out of the equation. Sure, I believe you that most of your bad customers were black, but does that matter? Your issues were:
1) People were cheap and not leaving tips. So you raised your prices to weed out cheap people and reserved the right to add tip to the check.
2) You changed music to attract a certain demographic. Great, what did you change it to? If you changed it to classical I would be very pleased. (I am particularly fond of romantic era Russian composers if you wanted to know.) Classic rock? Awesome. Just know that I will probably tip better if you play more Led than Beatles. My skin color in no way determines my music taste.
3) You instituted a dress code. I wear jeans maybe, ten times a year. I almost always wear a tie, even though I am an independent consultant who works from home most days and could wear whatever I want. I like to be formal, and to be honest I wish we could go back to the days when most men wore ties and jackets all the time. Your dress policy would have made you establishment more attractive to me.
The point is that you attached race to something that you should not have. If I walked into you restaurant would you really deny me a table or claim you were full only because I was black? Is it worth excluding people like me just because you think you need to paint an entire race with such a wide brush?
TL;DR: There are respectful black people out there who would be more than willing to give you good money for your services.
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guyonphone 7 points 2 hours ago[-]
How do you treat mixed race parties? For Example, I am white but I have friends who are black. Do you apply these same tactics because there is a black person present. Or do you treat the group as if we were all white?
Also if a black family came in and were patient and non abusive and stayed to be seated, would you still seat them?
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zahachta 7 points 3 hours ago[-]
I was a waitress for 10 (think Denny's) years. Way to generalize, it's not "blacks." It can be any group. I dreaded college kids, AA'rs, and groups of blacks. If you look at these groups, they have something in common, and it isn't their skin color.
I also want to state, that each of these generalized groups also included experiences of unbelievable generosity.
I also found that I had an attitude waiting on them assuming in advance that they would tip me terribly. This change in thinking began one night I was bored and decided I would be a french fine dining waitress - I treated everyone who walked into the door as if they had entered an elite restaurant. Turns out, respect and treating someone like an invaluable customer is a pay it forward kind of thing.
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Thrace 5 points 6 hours ago[-]
I agree with what a lot of other people have already said -- that is, that most of what you did is perfectly reasonable and actually very smart from the standpoint of having happier waitstaff and providing a better environment for your customers. The dress code bit may be a bit of a stretch, since it sounds like you run a pretty homey, family-style restaurant.
Knowing that you deliberately fail to seat black customers and lie about gratuity makes you quite the scoundrel, though. You should be able to discontinue this policy and still see good results. I'm curious, has anyone in the community noticed and commented on this? Have you gotten any press, good or bad, connected to your recovery?
What state are you in? City?
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